Have you noticed that can easily step in when we see an injustice taking place against another yet when we face an uneasy situation we back down? Why is it that we can stand up for a family member or a stranger in the moment? Yet when we have to defend or ask for a specific righting of a wrong, for ourselves, we pull back or flatly let it go.

Throughout my children’s younger years I was able to easily walk into a school or onto a soccer field and speak my mind to stand up for one of my boys. I had confidence and I delivered my opinion in a very polite yet clear manner. I never wavered or questioned if I should do this. I knew I must be their advocate as they were under my care. They were still too young to right a wrong for themselves. When my mother was ill and in the hospital I was able to defend her and demand that she be seen and not overlooked. I was her health advocate. Without me she would not have gotten the treatment she needed.

Years later when I had my work accident which resulted in a back injury, I found it very difficult to be my own advocate. I was in constant pain, felt weak, and uncertain. I knew what I did not want yet I was scared to fight for what I believed I should get. Not speaking up for myself wasted precious time in terms of my recovery. I instinctually knew that everybody involved in my case was simply doing a job. I was a number to them and nothing more. I was not a woman, wife, mother with feelings, emotions, pain, and suffering whose life had completely changed in a split second. They called the shots and I followed their orders. I was lost in a system that was unfamiliar to me. I was a victim and remained a victim for a couple of years.

But the day finally came when there was so much injustice and thoughtless decisions that my critical thinking brain said “Enough!” that day I stopped being a victim. I became my own advocate. I realized nobody else would speak up or defend me. I had to do it for myself. I knew I had it in me as I mentioned before I had often been an advocate for others. That day I began to feel stronger. I was doing right by me! After all that is what life is about…loving and honouring ourselves.

Why is it so scary to fight for ourselves? I believe it comes down to fear. Fear of what others will say or think. Fear of being pushy. Fear of being wrong. Fear of getting into trouble. We should be more concerned of the result if we do not listen to our own instinct or when we accept treatment that is less than we deserve.

When thrown a curve ball in your life, bring forth your inner warrior persona. Allow them to lead you into battle to defend yourself. Speak up and ask questions. Do your research. Bring up alternative solutions or treatments. Prove them wrong. Remember, it is your health, state of mind, quality of life that is at stake.

Don’t ever let anyone break your soul. You have to stand on your own two feet and fight. There are those who would give anything to see you fall, never give them the satisfaction, hold your head high, put a smile on your face, and stand your ground.

Author unknown